You Are Not Alone If This Time of Year Feels Hard

What to do when you’re feeling overwhelmed or grieving during the winter months and holidays.

Not everyone looks forward to the winter season and holidays. In fact, it can be one big trigger that has folks feeling anything but happy. There are lots of reasons why people struggle or feel overwhelmed this time of year. Losing a loved one, mental health, financial hardship, strained family relationships, lack of representation (identity, culture, religion, race), and past trauma are just some of the more common things that can cause challenges and affect how people might be feeling when the winter months set in. You also might not celebrate holidays at all, or the same ones as the people you are surrounded by. Even those who enjoy the winter and holiday season, can still experience feelings of stress and overwhelm. Have you experienced any of these things? Are you living through them now?

If you’re feeling down or stressed out, you’re not alone. It’s more than O.K. to feel this way. Many people feel this way. I feel this way right now. When my father passed away four years ago, I started experiencing stress, grief, and sadness when winter and holidays approached. I still do. So do many of my clients. Over the years, I have helped my clients, as well as myself, work through the challenges of stress and grief that can come up this time of year. One of the first things we discuss is acknowledging these feelings and setting some goals on how we want to feel. (Often times, we push down how we are feeling and sacrifice our well being for the sake of others.) The next, is coming up with some action steps and easy ways to feel some relief so that the stress and grief don’t take over or sidetrack goals.

Here are some action steps and ideas my clients have found success with, when it comes to managing stress and grief during the winter months and holidays:

  1. Create a gratitude list.

  2. Remember a lost loved one with a special letter, a candle, a photo tribute.

  3. Start a new/your own holiday tradition.

  4. Meditate.

  5. Say “No” and turn down invitations to social gatherings/functions if you don’t feel good in those spaces.

  6. Tell people how you’re feeling. It’s O.K. to say “I’m struggling, I”m not up for this, I just want to be alone” when people ask how you are/what you want.

  7. Take time for yourself. ( a walk outside, a day away, spa treatment, exercise, an art class, etc)

  8. Breathe. ( whether it’s deep breathing, a step away into some fresh air, or just remembering to take a breath before you respond/react)

  9. Set up a “feel good” playlist or music/songs that you love or remind you of things that make you happy.

  10. Write yourself a love letter/note and read it out loud/post it up! (Do it daily)

This time of year especially, take time to gift yourself with what you need! Put yourself first. I hope you find these tips helpful. If you want to chat or are interested in working together 1:1 to work on managing stress, grief, or other goals please feel free to contacting me. Above all else, please remember that no matter what you are experiencing, you are never alone.

MaryEllen Giombetti